Having a good opinion of oneself is often associated with vanity or
arrogance. Having high self-esteem, however, is to be in a healthy
psychological state. Those who are in a healthy psychological state are
more likely to achieve their life goals. People with high self-esteem
are often calm, positive, purposeful, expressive and assertive. They are
completely comfortable in their well nourished and exercised bodies.
They do not seek approval from others, they are confident in their own
actions.
Conversely, people with low self-esteem experience fear; they
can feel negative, passive, tense, de-motivated, and generally unhappy
with life, with no desire to change – “what’s the point?”. Whenever
self-esteem is low, success and happiness is affected. The world can
appear to be a very grey place.
Self-esteem and health are inextricably linked. By keeping
healthy, you will feel motivated to identify and achieve your life
goals, which leads to higher self-esteem. In turn, having high
self-esteem means that you value yourself enough to want to look after
your health!
If you find that your self-esteem is low, find below 5 top tips
to help you move forward.
Step 1 - EXORCISE THE EXERCISE EXCUSES!
So you
hate the idea of going to the gym? Why not try a new or
invigorating hobby, such as canoeing, skydiving or
rollerblading. Go for a long walk, rather than a run. Take up
gardening. Try a different approach to the gym - go at a
different time, try a new class or routine, find a partner to go
with. By associating exercise with something you enjoy, rather
than perceiving it as a chore, you will increase your motivation
levels. Plan a reward for yourself after each activity. After
each session, endorphins will be making you feel good, so give a
word to this feeling, and say this word to yourself whenever you
feel like you can’t be bothered. You will soon discover a new
vitality.
STEP 2 - BE YOUR OWN CRITIC
If you
are your own critic, you can measure how accurate other people’s
criticisms are of you! Make time for self-reflection and
self-appraisal every day. Some questions to ask may include:
-
What have I achieved
today?
-
What have I enjoyed?
-
How have I taken
care of myself?
-
What could I do
differently/in a better way?
-
What goals can I set
for tomorrow/next week etc
STEP 3 - SHOOT YOUR LIFE MOVIE
Review
your life so far, and view it as if you were watching a real
life movie. What type of movie would it be – comedy?,
action-packed?, tragedy? What are your successes so far?
Now ask yourself what type of movie you would like it to be?
What would be your achievements? Give your movie a title, and
identify which actor/actress will play the leading role. What
are their qualities? What can you do to make this movie your
real life story?
Remember the title. Keep a picture of the leading actor close to
hand. Use these as affirmations and reminders of what you want
to achieve whenever you are feeling down or de-motivated.
Step 4 - LISTEN TO YOURSELF
Sometimes we experience very sad periods in our life. If you are
experiencing genuine sadness, to allow these feelings to build
up can be damaging, and may lead to depression. Give yourself
permission to feel sad. Shut out the world for a while, and set
aside private time to heal. Give yourself some comfort - a soak
in the bath, special music, nice food, etc and explore how you
are feeling.
Don’t be afraid of tears. If these feelings of sadness persist,
consult your GP, who may be able to recommend a counsellor, who
will be able to support you.
Step 5 - PUT YOURSELF FIRST
Putting
yourself first sounds selfish, doesn’t it? But consider how much
time you spend helping others, whilst not taking care of
yourself first. Check how much you are giving to others. People
with low self-esteem often give too much of themselves to
others, which can leave them feeling resentful and unworthy.
Tell yourself that you are worthy of your own time and energy.
Nicola Forshaw is a professional life coach with an advanced
diploma. She is dedicated to supporting life/work aspirations,
and is an experienced relationship coach. Nicola offers a FREE
initial consultation. Contact her at
mail@njcoaching.co.uk or you can visit her website at
www.njcoaching.co.uk
